back on track

I really want to lose the rest of my weight. I can't say for sure what my goal weight is, I thought 150, but I can't even remember the last time I was this size let alone respectably under 200. So I don't know what I'm going to look like as the weight drops off and I become thinner, leaner, and healthier. I do know that I want to be strong--which means building muscle (lean muscle that is), so if my weight is a little higher than I thought it would be, but I look good and am strong, that's fine with me.

I'm determined to finish what I started. And not only finish, but to maintain and continue the healthy lifestyle. There's a definite finish line (my goal weight), but it doesn't mean my life stops there. I kicked butt this week and exercised EVERY DAY since Tuesday. That's right. Every day. I knew I had it in me, and this week has proven that my will is still there. I'm still willful, and I'm still stronger than my impulses. And that makes me feel strong. It makes me feel powerful. It motivates me.

So I changed my weight tracker to reflect my weight--207.4. Ah, I've seen that number so many times it makes me mad. I want to lose at least 5lbs in March. It can and will be done. I have this little hope in the back of my mind that maybe even I can get under 200. The only way though is to be consistent, and to make wise choices.

So here I am, with 7.5 hours of sleep (and having woken up naturally), ready to kick start my day with my daily motivator, a glass of water, and a spiritual pick me up. Then, I'm going to get my cardio on ;)

Day one of my daily motivator talks about how we let our past failures ruin our current attempts. We get motivated, stay on track, then slip up, and get frustrated and discouraged and then feel like quitting. "Rather than being fearful that you'll repeat the past, build a new way of thinking." It tells you to list out things you used to do, and replace them with new habits.

I used to eat candy and processed sugar every day, but now I eat sweet treats in moderation.

I used to make excuses for why I couldn't exercise, but now I give myself reasons to exercise.

I used to eat out of boredom, but now I make a conscious decision to eat when I'm really hungry.

I used to "track my calories" in my head, but now I keep myself accountable by tracking them online.

I used to quit when things got hard, but now I persevere to the end, and WILL reach my goals.

What are things you used to do that you've replaced with better habits?

Along with my daily motivator, I've decided to read a little bit of the Bible every day. My faith is important to me, but I seem to be focusing on the social justice aspect of it rather than my personal growth. So I'm going to read a chapter (ish) a day and just comment on what grabs my interest. I'm starting in Matthew :)

"'The virgin will be with child and will give birth to a son, and they will call him Immanuel'--which means, 'God with us.'" Matt 1:23

I went to school to learn about this stuff, and I've been over many profound things--I've studied the Hebrew, exegeted scripture, and really dug in so that the Bible is very familiar to me. So it's funny when a simple verse like this sticks out and reminds me that the basis of my faith, the reason that I stay, is because God is with us. God is with me, along side of me, loving me, cheering me on, picking me up, comforting me, leading me, etc. He is WITH me...not just observing from the magical clouds in the sky, he is with me. He doesn't leave me alone to figure it all out, and he cares about the things I care about. Including being healthy. What a concept to be reminded of as I reembark on this weight loss/healthy lifestyle journey--God is with me. God is good :)