last straw eating

Oh me oh my I weighed myself this morning and I'm lower than I was yesterday :) I have this terrible habit of weighing myself everyday, multiple times a day--before I pee, after I pee, right in the morning, when I get home from a run, randomly after I eat a big meal--it's kind of an obsession. The good news is is that the scale doesn't make me wanna quit if I see a number I want to see...it makes me all the more determined to beat it!  It makes me even more determined when I see lower numbers...I get addicted to the weight loss and the progress. I guess it could be called an addiction to success?

At some levels, I know what I'm capable of. I know I can successfully track calories, eat healthy, do a workout, eat breakfast, drink enough water, etc. I know that I can see progress on the scale because I've seen it before and I know what it takes. On other levels, I'm just beginning to realize what my body is capable of--it's can run longer than I thought, it can push itself to limits it's never achieved before, it can walk up steep (awful) hills in the heat, it can do girl pushups (and one day will do REAL pushups).  It can do a lot, I just have to tell myself that I can do it. I can't have a defeatist attitude and assume that just because I haven't done it before means I can't do it. I mean, I never ran a lap before in my life, and last week I did it. I've never run two laps in a row before in my life...but I won't know if my body is capable unless I try. And if it's not ready yet, it will be soon...because I'll keep pushing until I get there.

Today the book talked about last straw eating, which just basically connected with the whole "chain events" type of thing. You know sometimes, the book really resonates with me, and other times, I'm just like "meh." This next set of chapters seems like it's gonna be on the "meh" side. Ah well. I'm gonna finish this damn book even if I die of boredom :)

"Therefore, as God's chosen people, holy and dearly loved, clothe yourselves with compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness and patience. Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you. And over all these virtues put on love, which binds them all together in perfect unity." Col. 3:12-14

It's funny as I was writing this, I was wondering how many people think of Christians when they think of compassion, kindness, humility, gentleness, patience, forgiveness, and love. Because so many "christians" that I've come in contact with have been anything BUT this. I've encountered angry, picketing Christians. I've encountered self righteous, "I have all the answers and you better listen to me" Christians. I'm met many Christians who have held a grudge, tightly, and with bitterness. And I've met Christians who will look at someone who is less fortunate than them and ignore, even scoff at the poverty.

I've definitely met some loving Christians too...but sometimes it's hard to recognize the good when the loudest most outrageous ones are in your face all the time. Sigh. I know that I've been impatient, unloving, proud, and unforgiving at many points in my life. There aren't perfect people, and I count myself among that special group of people who falters everyday. I do hope, desire, and aspire to be someday espouse those qualities. Ask and you'll receive right?